brrrr

so the pope has to be a sort of PR person, right? like he cant just say whatever he feels like, he needs to tread carefully etc. of course, he has the Holy Spirit on his side in a slightly more tangible way then your average being, but still ...

if you're a tenured professor, you can pretty much say whatever you want. you dont need to be quite as judicious, unless you are extremely aware of the impact you have on your students, and this is something i think macintyre appreciates. i honestly dont think he ever says anything that he doesnt throughly believe to be true

so if it came to a philosophical difference between mac and JPII, and you just had to accept one or the other ... who would you go with?
not a matter of faith, but intense philosophy.

just a question.


ps

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAC!!!!!

phew

when you dont write for ages, the thought of starting up again can be daunting

i was going to do a thanksgiving post, but obviously didnt
it was really nice
i woke up earlyish, went to the DH with allison and christene
food was good, kids were cute, it was all very nice
then i spent about 4 hours on the phone, grandma, home, marmar, patch, jacquelyn, etc.
my favourite part was being curled up on my bed
lights off, heavy snow falling outside, heater on
cup of tea and an episode of supernatural

ahh .... it was nice

hung out with my friend mike gerardi for a little bit, watching the SC/ASU game, talking about football in general

i really like football. like, really like it.
glad we went out the way we did. stanford was a messy game, but hilarious
and anything that makes zibby smile ... well, odds are ill be happy too

[ps tavita pritchard? anyone? why dont WE get samoan quarterbacks?]


last night was nice too, diana came over from chicago, she and i stayed up late cutting out snowflakes ...
badin is psycho decorated, the phrase "looks like christmas threw up in here" might have been used, oddball decorations, bedraggled tinsel, broken lights held up with blue painting tape ... its pretty classic


well, i should go to class ... its why im here after all
speaking of, there's this guy in a couple of my classes, who never reads and skips all the time
and i get that if its a required class that you really really dont want to be in (poli sci for ex), why waste time going if you can learn it on your own and sped more time studying for the classes you want
but when you're a senior, everything you're taking is because you allegedly want to be there ... why do you skip? why do you NEVER read?
conversation at breakfast (circ 9am):
(im sitting by myself, with the NYtimes, very happy, quiet, enjoying my eggs)
guy *throws down tray* "hey!"
me " ... hi"
"mind if i join you?!"
" ... whatever ... im not a morning person fyi"
"oh ... neither am i ... this is the earliest ive been up since before fall break!"
"why"
"oh i had class"
" ... makeup time?"
"oh no, its at 8"
"every week"
"yup, its my favourite too. i love it so much."
" .... but you havent been since fall break?"
"yeah, i just cant get up"
" ... yet this is your favourite class"
"yeah, its really sad, i wish i could go more"
"you just dont bother to get up. seriously."
"yeah .... "
"wow" *go back to paper*
"oh, you probably think im a terrible person ... you must study all the time"
"not really, no. i do the reading and go to class though"
*looks all sad* "i know i know. ive wasted my college time. im a waste"

i didnt bother consoling him.
dont interrupt my breakfast.

old ladies and freshman football players

so i was just in the restroom in the library, fixing my hair when this ancient vietnamese woman came in and started making conversation about what a beautiful day it was. very cheerful.
then i left and she was behind me so i held the door open for her (she barely came up to my chest, tiny tiny), and she looks up with this wide smile and says "have a nice life!"
it was really nice.

then i looked into a classroom on my way back to work, and saw my new football boyfriend ... what a great day.

oops

yeah, so about my icon.
its minotaur, and its crying because its going to be killed by theseus... maybe

its from the album artwork of Amnesiac
a labyrinthine work, entered at one's own risk

?


[just a possibility]

ps

6. my "Jew thing" (as one friend so delicately put it)

7. Absolute Obsession with kierkegaard (hee hee). i wrote a thingy in my last class because nieman "silenced" me, basically saying that i talked all the time and he was going to force other people to. it was frustrating, i had a lot to say. so i wrote this thingy, and titled it (keep in mind, i never title anything) "poetical fragments"
i really enjoyed that.

thoughts

here i am going to list things that i want to think about outloud, do not have the time at the moment, but do not want to forget.
im putting them out in the open because im more likely to follow through this way, and i really do want to figure these out

1. the library is seriously considering phasing out bookplates, and listing all donor information online. my immediate reaction was "NO", and i had to spent about 15min explaining to my boss why, at the same time figuring it out for myself.
i basically ended up saying that the libraries owe the time and effort to the donors and even if they dont consciously notice them, its important for the students to see them
her first reaction was "oh yeah ... maybe later in life they'll remember and they'll donate too"
but thats not it, in fact i think thats a terrible reason. i want it to be non utilitarian ... more like the libraries setting an example for the students, than trying to put subliminal messaging out there.

2. section A of the nytimes. im obsessed. i actually dont like eating with people anymore, i look forward to sitting in a corner reading.
ive noticed that i scan headlines, and the ones im most likely to stop and read have to do with Iran, China, the Congo, or major businesses merging.
which is redic because im the token politics hater in the family, and i REALLY hate business.
know your enemies?

3. how i feel about life terms for juveniles. did you know that the US was the only country in the whole UN that advocates life sentence without the option of parole for juvies? why is that?
i dont know how i feel ... my head says that they should get a second chance, my gut (sry mom) says that they shouldnt.

4. we potentially need to create subdivisions of "minor." rape is evil and vicious no matter what, obviously. but there has to be a concrete difference in raping a 17 year old and a 3 year old (some guy who raped a 3 yearold girl and videotaped it four years ago got caught yesterday). i dont know. something about child molesters.
im mentally opposed to the death penalty ... but anyone who does anything to a child like that deserves to be impaled and fed to the harpies.

5. i love the dali lama.

ZOMBIE DANCE!

if you want to laugh really REALLY hard, look up pitchforkmedia's review of in rainbows.
i was in tears, silently, because there are a ton of people studying around me.

i also discovered that if andy samberg is in something, im going to laugh really hard. even if it is just him punching people right before they eat something.
i think he's samardzija's lost twin.

i feel like i have had nothing to say for a while.
i read the NYtimes every breakfast ... almost always rip out some article.
but im left all blergh. maybe its cos currently my sinuses are filled with blood.

maybe im devoting my subconscious to figuring out what on EARTH im going to do for the OC's aquinas paper. grrr.


oh well, there'll always be youtube and snl digital shorts.


[live your dreams!!!!]

bloods

yeah, so i was getting ready for bed, cleaning up etc
perhaps cleaned my ears with a non-earcleaning cottony stick thing
perhaps felt a slight discomfort, nothing to worry about
and after noticed that cottony stick thing is all bloody
and my ear feels wet

yeah, so i googled "bleeding ear"
not too much to do, positive the ear drum is intact, but thought maybe there was some reason for it
like, i didnt/dont feel a pain, i have no idea what happened

but once i saw "viral hemorrhagic fever" on the list of possible causes
i stopped looking


so yeah, other than that im fine
maybe i have ebola, but as far as a i know
im fine


*brrrr*

R A D I O H E A D

its here. i woke up at 6:55am to listen to the world radio premier streamed online from london.
ive listened to it 3x so far ... im not sure what to think, where it falls on the radiohead rateometer
been talking to my friend sean all morning online about it, compare/contrast
i think its brilliant
im going to put it on my mp3 player
listen to it all day
but yes ... and videotape may be one of the most beautiful songs ... ever

I Ran

i think im in love with andy samberg.
and as i predicted, i am the ONLY person who even likes Hot Rod, let alone is OBSESSED here


but yeah:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=UnpNkPCcfBM&mode=related&search=

[trust me]

IN RAINBOWS

from deadairspace.com

Hello everyone.

Well, the new album is finished, and it's coming out in 10 days;

We've called it In Rainbows. (http://www.inrainbows.com)

Love from us all.

Jonny

**********

i found out from iain about 20minutes after he found out, we freaked out mutually for a little bit, then parted ways to spread the good news.
a subdued stevo knows, told marmar, was going to call home but gerd called right then, and so i informed him as well

ive been writing notes, and posting and pretty much telling anyone i can think of
this is the best news since ... well, since a LONG time, and im am STOKED

its going to be phenomenal, absolutely glorious beautiful
ive stopped shaking
but
i feel like im glowing



rain after the longest drought
rain
rain brings rainbows


["In Rainbows" -Radiohead, released October 10, 2007]

hey everyone

take this!


http://www.politicalcompass.org/

my political compass:

Economic Left/Right: -4.62
Social Libertarian/Authoritarian: -4.51

i still dont get what it means, but im somewhere near gandhi ... it probably would have helped if i knew anything about globalization probably. and some of the questions are weirdly phrased and such, but it is funny, esp when they place current world leaders

aiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight im out

YES

Your results:
You are Supergirl

Supergirl 68% Spider-Man 65% Green Lantern 65% Hulk 65% Superman 60% The Flash 60% Iron Man 60% Robin 58% Wonder Woman 53% Batman 40% Catwoman 30%

Lean, muscular and feminine. Honest and a defender of the innocent.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz




i finally found a superhero quiz where im a GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!
and supergirl at that, aweeesome

a-jad

yeah, i read pretty much everything in usa today, the ny times, and nro on the shindig at colombia.
what a mess.

however, what struck me most was this quote from usa today:

"In 1933, there was a fascist called Adolf Hitler," said Rachmael Benhaim, a 40-year-old psychologist from Queens who took time off from work to participate in the rally. "If people had protested against him, 6 million Jews would be alive … and World War II would not have happened. The lesson we learned is people have to come out and protest before things happen."


protesting ... our culture and its pathetic obsession with protesting

of course, i had this in mind:

"the self assertive shrillness of protest arises because the facts of incommensurability ensure that protesters can never win an argument; the indignant self-righteousness of protest arises because the facts of incommesurability ensure equally that the protesters can never lose an argument either. hence the utterance of protest is characteristically addressed to those who already share the protesters' premises. the effects of incommensurability ensure that protesters rarely have anyone else to talk to but themselves. this is not to say that protest cannot be effective; it is to say that it cannot be rationally effective and that its dominant modes of expression give evidence of a certain perhaps unconscious awareness of this."


yeaaaaaahhhhhhh macintyre.

0-4

putting sharpley in at the fourth ... we might as well have screamed "WE QUIT" to the world

i dont mind losing, i mean i hate it, but i can live
but giving up?

ive never felt more defeated in my life
we kept it together and could have done it

we're a young team, its going to be hard and we have a really rough schedule
they were ok, not great but ok

our coach gave up on us.
the team deserves more than that
the student section deserved WAY more

he gave up on all of us.

how can you know if virtue can be taught if you do not even know what virtue is?

Continued dialogue. Conversation. Sustained dialogue. Nothing.

we sit amongst ourselves and wax poetic on the evils and pitfalls of the modern world.
in the safety of our circles of friends, we conspire and dream.
how are we going to change the world
what everyone else is doing wrong
abortion
euthanasia
global warming
sexual violence
republicans democrats conservatives liberals psycho crazy deluded perverse evil

the labels we bestow upon ourselves and others keep us safe
protected by definition and absolutes, we do not need to look farther
we have the answers.
we know whats wrong and what is right

self definition
years decades centuries epochs of definitions continually constricting
incommensurability

divides that once were no more than scratches have deepened
the jugular is almost cut and western culture is bleeding to death

everything must be broken down
back to basics
before our wound can be healed


this healing cannot be forced
incommensurability must not be, cannot be destroyed through violence
arguments
hatred
suffering

[mutually assured destruction]

it must be overcome in love

we cannot know how to overcome it, without fully understanding it
we cannot fully understand it while simultaneously aggravating it
isolating ourselves
private dialogue

no matter how long your reach, this chasm is wider
if we do not first reach out to each other
we will fall off the cliff and join in the bloodbath

joined hands and minds


until we can find something so precious
so important
so beloved by all
that the risk of falling is worth the attempt to grasp

the chasms become deeper
the fall more devastating
and that unspeakable something, almost invisible the distance is so wide
will not only be passed over in silence
it will never be shown
it will fade into nothing




it must be shown


how


what is beloved by all
what is sought by all

the good life for man is a life spent in seeking the good life

the heart of Christianity lies in solidarity, not solitude


we must seek together
all
humanity

until the day the cherished something is not what unites us
we no longer reach out for ourselves
risking our lives to the fall
we reach past and aid our brother in grasping it as well
and to catch him if he slips along the way

which marvel superhero are you?

created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as The Hulk, The product of a science experiment gone awry, Bruce Banner turns into the unstoppable green monster the "Hulk" whenever his temper rises. The more angry he gets, the stronger the Hulk becomes. Bruce travels the world, hoping to find a cure for the Hulk and bring his life back to normal. However, he often has to become the Hulk to save those he loves when danger threatens.

The Hulk

90%

Blade

80%

The Punisher

80%

Elektra

75%

Wolverine

70%

The Invisible Girl

70%

The Human Torch

65%

Cyclops

60%

Storm

60%

The Thing

55%

Mr. Fantastic

50%

Daredevil

50%

Spider-Man

40%



***********

i love this, apparently im a very angry person, cos im almost the punisher AND wolverine, and im prettymuch not spiderman at all.
was all, dangit, not batman? but yeah, i dont think he's marvel. in fact, he's DC

i think all in all i like DC more than marvel. i think.
i should look into it.







that's pretty sweet tho, huh.

guess who!

ok, the guy who's in both, right and left respectively. who does he look like?
hint: his initials are m.w. and he plays the organ and likes taking pictures of marmar

YEAH

so, obviously mark is somehow related to TEARS FOR FEARS (my newish obsession) and they are english and so is he and they're both musical and its so totally true.
i was very excited when i discovered this.


im also excited because i found a sweet, very rare, VERY cheap, TFF poster on ebay, and i got it for myself.
my room is looking gooood.

ok. im off.

you should listen to "woman in chains" -tff. youtube it or something.

ALSO, you know my pseudo friend "crowded house guy" that i IM with from time to time? well, he sent me some stuff from one of his friend's bands. it is brilliant. im truly obsessed. AND, they are touring with this ND grad right now, who puts on great shows, and they're coming to chicago in three weeks and im SUPER pumped. cos im going with christene and some of her crowd.
yeah, its been a good weekend.

memories

how long do you mourn before it is time to move on?
yesterday ginna was really frustrated because there was not an all-school campus mass at the basilica scheduled for today
i tried to soothe her, pointing out that it has been six years after all, and at some point we need to move on, we dont memorialize pearl harbour still after all

then i woke up this morning at 845, i lay in bed for a minute thinking about how i really didnt want to wake up, and eventually noticed in my sleepdrugged state that the bell of the basilica was ringing, slowly, like it does when there is a funeral on campus
at first i was confused, then i remembered the date, and was even more confused and irritated because i thought at first they got the time wrong - it was 546am that the towers were hit
and 630am when i found out -i wont ever forget that

of course, then i realized that im on the east coast for time ... it actually was right

so i lay in bed for 10 minutes, listening to the bells
noticing that the light at that time is so beautiful
and that six years ago it was another perfect beautiful day
until new york, dc, and pittsburgh became hells

i hate thinking about 9/11 and i still cannot watch footage from the 11th -13th
but listening to those deep slow bells, i couldnt help it
and tears flooded back with the memories

so when i got to the dining hall for breakfast, opened up the campus paper, and saw nothing
absolutely nothing
i became enraged

this country has started to either ignore the day, or turn it into the official anti-war day
i hate that people use today to push the war, or cry out against it

for me, this is still a day of mourning
-not to be contaminated with political agendas-
i, myself, have not moved on
and am still deeply bothered by memories of six years ago
i watched tv all day long
and before they fell i watched human beings jumping out of burning towers
a nation watched them fall like rag dolls
it was the most horrific thing i had, and have, ever seen
and we saw people become buried alive when the second tower fell

i was a country length away, but i was there
and i couldnt do anything
and that impotence stays with me still as i wonder how long will i have to mourn before i can heal from that

and i know that if i feel this way, millions of others must as well.
the towers were not landmarks for me
i have never even seen the pentagon
ive never walked in the fields outside of pittsburgh

no one i know died.


but this day is an agony, and my own school does nothing
nothing besides a peace rally/prayer service by the war memorial
and they dont even want peace
not true Peace
they want to make a statement

they want their voices to be heard

and i dont know how to deal with that
how can you want to speak,
when hearing is drowned in the cacaphony of 2,819 voices crying out to heaven

3,015 children who lost a parent


no, we are not ready to forget
like it or not, we are still, deeply, in mourning
i guess in a way, we do and always have "moved on"
keep going
... so i dont know when enough is enough
when it is appropriate to stop the memorials
not anytime soon for me
as a nation?
no, its still too near ... perhaps by the time the last firefighter who risked his life has passed on
perhaps then
for myself, when i can watch the towers fall and keep it together
maybe


for the now though

In paradisum deducant te Angeli; in tuo adventu suscipiant te martyres, et perducant te in civitatem sanctam Ierusalem. Chorus angelorum te suscipiat, et cum Lazaro quondam paupere æternam habeas requiem.

-we, who are undefeated
because we have gone on trying ...

quotes

picture of the day:(down is the new up, don't ya know)

so
im supposed to be looking up "motivational" quotes for this post board that people put the names of people who did nice things for them in the library. im finding it harder than it should be, seeing that i cant stand most things that are used motivationally. or just quotes in general like, i just looked up a bunch by eliot, and there are so many there that sound all deep and catchy by themselves, but knowing where they come from and their context, its so ridiculous that they've been quotized "humankind cannot bear very much reality" does that make ANY sense outside of context? does it? stupid. anyways, as i go on, im going to throw ones up here that catch my eye, but probably wont be too motivational : -O

"it's strange that words are so inadequate. yet, like the asthmatic struggling for breath, so the lover must struggle for words."
ts eliot

(unless you're lord peter)

"because philosophy arises from awe, a philosopher is bound in his way to be a lover of myths and poetic fables. poets and philosophers are alike in being big with wonder."
sir thomas aquinas

(sir! SIR!! gotta love stupid people.)

"i wonder anybody does anything at oxford but dream and remember, the place is so beautiful. one almost expects the people to sing instead of speaking. it is all like an opera."
yeats

(i dont care if he was a neo-pythagorea pantheist. im in love with yeats)

"the earth laughs in flowers."
ee cummings

(this made me think of mama)

Summer afternoon - summer afternoon; to me those have always
been the two most beautiful words in the English language.
henry james

(summer afternoon or cellar door ... gotta say, summer afternoon)


aaannnnnnddddddd!!!!!! just so you know, these are the ones i picked out for the post board thingy after four hours of searching ... well, with frequent breaks to look up grad school information, and desperately trying to find an appropriate radiohead quote, which of course failed, but wouldnt it have been hysterical? so i settled for finding apropos thingys from people i love instead, and some i dont even know but looked cliche enough:

“For us, there is only the trying. The rest is not our business.”
T. S. Eliot

“There are no rules of architecture for a castle in the clouds.”
Gilbert K. Chesterton

“I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.”
Michelangelo

”And say my glory was I had such friends.”
William Butler Yeats

“The world is mud-luscious and puddle-wonderful.“
e. e. cummings

“One of the most tragic things I know about human nature is that all of us tend to put off living. We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon--instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today.”

Dale Carnegie

"Sunshine is delicious, rain is refreshing, wind braces up, snow is exhilarating; there is no such thing as bad weather, only different kinds of good weather."-- John Ruskin

"The kindest thing you can do for the people you care about is to become a happy, joyous person." Brian Tracy

"A good laugh is sunshine in a house." William Makepeace Thackeray

"The greatest good you can do for another is not just share your riches, but reveal to
them their own." Benjamin Disraeli

"They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel." -- Carl W. Buechner

"Be kind and merciful. Let no one ever come to you without coming away better and happier."

Mother Theresa

“Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns.”

George Eliot

“No spring nor summer beauty hath such grace
As I have seen in one autumnal face.”
John Donne

“Whenever you have truth it must be given with love, or the message and the messenger will be rejected”

Ghandi

Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they are subtle and quick to anger.

J. R. R. Tolkien

"Now is our chance to choose the right side. God is holding back to give us that chance. It won't last forever. We must take it or leave it."

C.S. Lewis

“What would the world be, once bereft of wet and wildness? Let them be left. O let them be left, wildness and wet; Long live the weeds and the wilderness yet.”

Gerard Manley Hopkins

“One can know a man from his laugh, and if you like a man's laugh before you know anything of him, you may confidently say that he is a good man.”

Fyodor Dostoevsky

“In faith and hope the world will disagree, but all mankind's concern is charity. .”

Alexander the Great

“The love of heaven makes one heavenly.”

Shakespeare

i am AWESOME. i have alexander the great [!], hopkins, eliot, lewis, and yeats.

plus, i hope you caught how random that tolkien quote is. im going to print it off very small, put it in a corner, and see if anyone notices.

!!!